Mental Health Counseling Indianapolis Indiana

Directory of Therapists, Counselors and Mental Health Professionals in Indianapolis and Central Indiana

H. Fredrik (Rik) Spier, D.Min., LMFT, LCSW, LMHC
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marriage and family therapy, individual consultation and coaching, pastoral psychotherapy, certified imago relationship therapist Darlene is a therapist-in-training at the CTS Counseling Center and a life coach. She specializes in personal professional growth and development as well as lifestyle change. Please feel free to contact her for a complimentary coaching session and for information about the services she offers. Call Darlene today to experience the growth you've been seeking!! In the 35 years I have worked with clients, I've learned that our lives can change instantly. Sudden death, life threatening diagnosis, accidents, job loss, marriage, or divorce can shake us at our inner core. I also know that conflicts in relationships can be devastating and confusing. I strive to provide a safe, caring, compassionate and professional environment for you to work and find solutions. Feel free to call for a brief telephone consultation (no charge) to determine if I'm the right person to help you with your concerns. Membership: Indiana Oncology Social Workers; National Association of Social Workers. This lesson highlights the diversity among people that is part of everyday life. It draws the distinction between external, observable differences and internal, emotional experiences that all people share in common. These external differences are displayed visually while the song explores the theme that “inside we are all the same,” despite how we might talk, act, dress, or otherwise live our lives. One of the greatest challenges in parenting is setting clear, consistent rules for your children. Although the content and consequences vary by age, consistency in enforcement remains crucial regardless of the age of the child. Here are some ideas to help with setting rules that are effective and consequences that are workable for you as a parent to enforce. Know your own rules. This seems obvious, yet how are children to know the rules if you don’t have a clear idea of what is important to you. Some rules are safety issues and are never negotiable, like crossing the street without looking or leaving the home without permission. Other rules set guidelines about how to treat others or family standards. Determine for yourself if your rules involve safety issues or values that you want to impress upon your child. Most parents have rules that fall in both categories. Make a list of rules that are important to you. Make sure that the rules are clear. Define rules by specific behaviors. “Don’t get in trouble” leaves too much room for interpretation by both you and your child. “Treat me with respect” can be equally vague for a teenager. Behavioral requests such as: look at me when I am talking to you, do not begin to talk until I am finished, do not roll your eyes or walk away while I am talking to you are helpful. Have conversations about rules when they are not being broken. Define the rules with your children when you are not angry and when they are open to listening. If you chose, you may even explain why you are setting a rule. Keep in mind that an explanation does not open the rule to negotiation but rather allows for understanding. Discussing a rule prior to its violation allows for clear expectations for the child and consistency in enforcement from the parent. Set clear, simple consequences. These must also be discussed when the rules are set. There may be different levels of consequences. If a child breaks rule X, they might lose TV for a day. Subsequent violation may lead to a loss for a week or grounding (be sure to define what grounding means if you use it). Some safety rules may have more severe consequences on one violation to enforce the importance of the rule. Follow through on the consequences that are set. Without this step, setting rules is a worthless exercise. Help your self in this area by not setting up consequences that limit you. Don’t take away a movie if you want to see it. Determine how you will find support when enforcement is difficult.Parenting isn’t easy but rule setting and enforcement can become easier if you are intentional about your rules and consequences and are clear about how rules will be enforced. During the holiday break, there are many opportunities to read, one of my favorite hobbies. One of the books I chose was Joan Didion’s The Year of Magical Thinking. Joan writes of the year after her husband’s sudden death when she is also dealing with the serious illness of her only daughter. In addition to the topic of grief, Didion handles the lack of control we feel about the events that occur in our lives; made all the more potent in the illusion that at some point we did have control. Her description of the grieving process beautifully captures its non-linear, non-predictable nature. Ms. Didion is a highly educated published writer yet the denial and pain of the grief is illustrated by her unwillingness to give away John’s shoes after his death, “ in case he needs them.” Reading this account of grief, brings to mind all of the other things we grieve in our lives. Grief in this case is the loss of a mate through death but the feelings of grief may also occur with the loss of a relationship, such as a divorce or break up. It might also occur when we lose the idea of a relationship that we thought should have been a certain way but wasn’t, like a relationship with a parent or a sibling. The grief that occurs when we process these types of losses may not come on as suddenly as that of a death but may be processed in a similar manner.Didion gives a personal voice to the process and her book is as much a love story and tribute to her relationship with her husband as it is a study of her process. There is much to be heard in this book at many levels.

 
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