Mental Health Indiana

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Me and My Shadow

            The famous Swiss psychologist Carl Jung spoke of the human shadow which can be loosely defined as those parts of ourselves that we pretend are not there, that we hide from others, and that we do not want anyone to know about.  Like our literal shadow, those inner secret parts follow us all the time.  Sometimes we get hints that they are there, but most of the time we do not see them.  Being aware of our shadows can give us some power over them and allow us to learn how they work against us.

Examples of shadows might be inner thoughts such as “I am not attractive,”  “I am not worthy,” or “I do not need or want anyone close to me in my life.”  If we are not aware of how they work, shadows can lead us to undermine our best intentions.  A shadow-based thought might sound like: “Since I believe I am not worthy of being loved, I will give you a reason to reject me.  I will unconsciously sabotage our relationship because it hurts less if I do it myself.”

John Goll is an Indiana Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT). He helps couples, families and individuals understand the patterns of thoughts, feelings and behaviors that keep them from having the relationships and the successes that they desire, while working with them to mobilize their ability and power to make the choices and changes that will make a real difference in their lives. 

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